Author Archives: Aisvarya dasa

Dreamless
→ Unplugged Ice

I had a dream. I was hovering above myself as I was dying, and no one noticed. Men, women and children passed by without blinking an eye at my demise on the pavement next to them. I made no noise for fear of disturbing them. I kept to myself for want of peace. And then, just as I was breathing my final breath, a small girl stopped and looked into my eyes. She said nothing but I knew her thoughts were mirroring mine as tears appeared in the corners of her eyes. I reached for her hand but she took a step back, out of reach. And then blackness.

By this time my eyes were wide open and I was in a cold sweat on my therm-a-rest®©. It was a bad dream, I told myself, and tried to fall back to sleep again but to no avail. Death in the dream was not disturbing me, nor was it the lack of interest from the masses; it was those tears, the look in that little girl’s face, and her subsequent standoffishness.

I sat up and drank some water from a glass next to me. Water – the elixir of life. Life – something we take for granted. Why is it that we need something overwhelming to happen to us in order to register that simple fact? That we can so easily go through life without blinking an eye, without even acknowledging existence let alone ponder over it. And before we know it we missed the boat and wasted a golden opportunity to understand.

I had to get up now and walk over to the window. Outside it was dark and drizzling. Small raindrops patted against the windowpane, eventually forming streams of water that glided down to the window’s ledge. These streams moved slowly at first, almost uncertain, but picked up speed and confidence before moving like lightening in the final third.

The transition of movement from apprehensive to certain in those small rivulets of water seemed so brief. In the beginning it was almost meditative, soothingly melancholy, to watch an element creatively exist and awkwardly function in another element. I could keep up with it. Mother Nature weeping in kindness. But then, when it built up to breakneck speed in such a short time and quickly vanished into it’s own at the end of it’s journey, I had to take a step back for my eye strained in trying to keep up.

Lightening struck. And then darkness. The sudden burst of light emphasizing the blackness that followed it. It was too dark to see anything outside the window for there were no streetlights nor was their moonlight for the clouds. I went back to the therm-a-rest®© and laid down on it again. My folly was to close my eyes, for off I drifted into a deep dreamless sleep wherein I forgot everything.

Dreamless
→ Unplugged Ice

I had a dream. I was hovering above myself as I was dying, and no one noticed. Men, women and children passed by without blinking an eye at my demise on the pavement next to them. I made no noise for fear of disturbing them. I kept to myself for want of peace. And then, just as I was breathing my final breath, a small girl stopped and looked into my eyes. She said nothing but I knew her thoughts were mirroring mine as tears appeared in the corners of her eyes. I reached for her hand but she took a step back, out of reach. And then blackness.

By this time my eyes were wide open and I was in a cold sweat on my therm-a-rest®©. It was a bad dream, I told myself, and tried to fall back to sleep again but to no avail. Death in the dream was not disturbing me, nor was it the lack of interest from the masses; it was those tears, the look in that little girl’s face, and her subsequent standoffishness.

I sat up and drank some water from a glass next to me. Water – the elixir of life. Life – something we take for granted. Why is it that we need something overwhelming to happen to us in order to register that simple fact? That we can so easily go through life without blinking an eye, without even acknowledging existence let alone ponder over it. And before we know it we missed the boat and wasted a golden opportunity to understand.

I had to get up now and walk over to the window. Outside it was dark and drizzling. Small raindrops patted against the windowpane, eventually forming streams of water that glided down to the window’s ledge. These streams moved slowly at first, almost uncertain, but picked up speed and confidence before moving like lightening in the final third.

The transition of movement from apprehensive to certain in those small rivulets of water seemed so brief. In the beginning it was almost meditative, soothingly melancholy, to watch an element creatively exist and awkwardly function in another element. I could keep up with it. Mother Nature weeping in kindness. But then, when it built up to breakneck speed in such a short time and quickly vanished into it’s own at the end of it’s journey, I had to take a step back for my eye strained in trying to keep up.

Lightening struck. And then darkness. The sudden burst of light emphasizing the blackness that followed it. It was too dark to see anything outside the window for there were no streetlights nor was their moonlight for the clouds. I went back to the therm-a-rest®© and laid down on it again. My folly was to close my eyes, for off I drifted into a deep dreamless sleep wherein I forgot everything.

Anything else dosn’t cut it
→ Unplugged Ice

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I dun be as sick as a wounded dawg. Yea, I have a recurrence of bronchitis which is causing a cough from hell, plus, as if that wasn’t enough, my right ear is blocked because of an infection. This is probably part of the deal of having been in India for the last 4 weeks (call it purification or karma). And so henceforth, my friends, here’s another practical lesson in how the material body is not for us… Gone is skipping dainty through daffodil carpeted fields of blissful existence and joy. Imploded have the promising dreams of a healthy life in serenity and sugar candied familial love. Regurgitated are the ambrosial delicacies that were brought forth for the finer pleasures of the palate. Creamed are the memories of happiness… all that is left in their place is a deaf stupor.

In the holy words of the monty python team sometime in the 1970s; “That’s nothing!” My so called cajoling with the stark inevitability of material agony is simply a stroll in the park in comparison with others’ who have it much worse. One devotee here in Taipei suffered polio in early life and because of it still sustains a dysfunctional leg to this day. He learned to overcome the regret and pain associated with it, even though it also cost him the chance to pursue his dream of an occupation as a doctor, for according to Taiwanese law you can’t be a doctor with such a disability. He now makes a living on the street making those little rubber stamps that Chinese people officially sign their names with. There really is no solace in material life; it leads simply to madness. But, for the majority of us, we still pray with folded hands and all sincerity that we can find some happiness in it.

Forget yoga, jnana and fruitive research. Simply meditate on the divine feet of Nanda Nandana with as much love as you can muster and beg the sublimely pure Sri for Her help. Anything else just won’t do.

Anything else dosn’t cut it
→ Unplugged Ice

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

I dun be as sick as a wounded dawg. Yea, I have a recurrence of bronchitis which is causing a cough from hell, plus, as if that wasn’t enough, my right ear is blocked because of an infection. This is probably part of the deal of having been in India for the last 4 weeks (call it purification or karma). And so henceforth, my friends, here’s another practical lesson in how the material body is not for us… Gone is skipping dainty through daffodil carpeted fields of blissful existence and joy. Imploded have the promising dreams of a healthy life in serenity and sugar candied familial love. Regurgitated are the ambrosial delicacies that were brought forth for the finer pleasures of the palate. Creamed are the memories of happiness… all that is left in their place is a deaf stupor.

In the holy words of the monty python team sometime in the 1970s; “That’s nothing!” My so called cajoling with the stark inevitability of material agony is simply a stroll in the park in comparison with others’ who have it much worse. One devotee here in Taipei suffered polio in early life and because of it still sustains a dysfunctional leg to this day. He learned to overcome the regret and pain associated with it, even though it also cost him the chance to pursue his dream of an occupation as a doctor, for according to Taiwanese law you can’t be a doctor with such a disability. He now makes a living on the street making those little rubber stamps that Chinese people officially sign their names with. There really is no solace in material life; it leads simply to madness. But, for the majority of us, we still pray with folded hands and all sincerity that we can find some happiness in it.

Forget yoga, jnana and fruitive research. Simply meditate on the divine feet of Nanda Nandana with as much love as you can muster and beg the sublimely pure Sri for Her help. Anything else just won’t do.