Ocean of Mercy: Bhakti Benefits for Doomed Cows?
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Myths and fantasies are an essential part of ordinary human culture. Through science fiction, legends, and fairy tales, the mundane imagination soars, unfettered by reality.

But here’s one daydream Krishna’s devotees, in the real world of bhakti, can do without: we spiritually benefit the condemned cow by offering its milk to Krishna.  

First of all, let’s avoid a straw-man response that often pops out of the closet when the milk issue arises: “Hmmm . . . I smell  . . . veganism! You are advocating a concoction, in a spiritual culture wherein milk plays such a central role.”

Let’s brush that diversion aside. Though well-intentioned, it’s far off the point. The issue is certainly not veganism or banning milk, but whether we should exercise spiritual discrimination in choosing from where we source our milk.

Without criticising those opting for the non-selective approach to their dairy products, an increasing number of devotees, both junior and very senior, feel strongly motivated to:

1) drink only milk from protected cows

2) avoid implication in the cow-slaughter industry

3) actively seek ahimsa milk solutions

4) remind devotees of Srila Prabhupada’s vision of ISKCON farms supplying milk to ISKCON centres.

Too often, though, ready to relieve our milk-loving society from any angst or disquietude, a folk tale sincerely issues forth: the dead cow has benefitted by our offering its milk to Krishna.

At the recent GBC meeting in Mayapur, four GBC-persons, while making an official presentation on ISKCON’s need for ahimsa milk, also dealt with the “graced-though-dead” notion.

Take the USA, for example. Aside from the 32 million cows, bulls, steers, and calves slaughtered annually, the USA has 9 million dairy cows on their feet, giving milk. 

Please tell me, when you offer your milk, which is the cow that has benefitted by giving that milk? 

Visit any dairy processing plant and you will see technology blending milk from thousands upon thousands of cows, the number increasing as the centralisation of the dairy industry mounts. In Canada, for example, now just 3 processing plants handle 80% of Canadian milk.

Consider the case of cow X. Alive for the usual 3 to 5 years, dairy cow X will never see its normal 20-year lifespan. Somehow cow X may—I repeat—may have been able to contribute a droplet to the milk that happened to find its way to your temple or home altar. Now really . . . can we please reconsider the “benefit legend” . . . 

The UN’s Food and Agriculture Organization says this planet has 260 million dairy cows. The UK has 1.8 million; Australia, 1.6 million; Canada, almost 1 million.

Let’s pick on New Zealand, a place famed for its top quality milk products. The Kiwis milk 4.6 million dairy cows, which annually produce 19.1 billion litres of milk for processing. Please find for me the cow that contributed the specific milk you offered?

Consider a few extrapolations, elastically based on shastra. The dust of the feet of devotees is spiritually invaluable. Therefore all pedestrians who tread an avenue where great devotees have walked now accrue spiritual credits? They benefit from the dust of Vaishnavas’ feet? 

Okay, you say these pedestrians weren’t walking barefoot; nor did they put the dust on their head. Consequently they don’t really get the mercy. But haven’t they “followed in the footsteps” of the great souls?

That’s stretching things too much, you reply? How about this: besides the dust of the feet, the water that washed the feet of devotees is another treasure of bhakti. 

Some devotees exercise by swimming in large public pools. Certainly some of the chlorinated pool water that envelops their feet then, throughout the day, flows over the submerged heads of other swimmers in the pool. What benefit unknowingly bestowed upon everyone in that Olympic sized pool! Though the pool contains 2,500,000 litres (648,000 gallons) of water, eventually recycled, surely some droplets of mercy will contact my head. And just think how I’d be benefitted . . . if some of the pool water . . . trickles into my mouth. After all, blended with the 2,500,000 litres of pool water must be a drop of holiness. 

Some of us old-timers remember way back in the early 70s when devotees, motoring past seemingly endless cornfields in the American midwest, would decide to stop and offer to Krishna a whole cornfield, as far as they could see. Convinced they had transformed all the countless rows of corn into prasada, the fledgling devotees rejoiced at how they had struck a blow against maya and uplifted the world. 

Other senior devotees recall enthusiastic cohorts who offered entire supermarkets to Krishna—mentally subtracting the meat, fish, and eggs. “Unknowingly all the shoppers will take home krishna-prasada!”

Outrageous, you say? I agree. Let’s consider the fantasised benefits to the millions of slaughtered cows in the same way.

Moreover, don’t forget that not only female calves but also male calves take birth, all to be killed sooner or later. How does our imagined ocean of mercy apply to the males, whether the ones allowed to mature, for steaks and hamburgers, or the newborns killed almost immediately, for delicate veal cuisine?

Back to living in the USA, we see that out of the total of 32 million cattle slaughtered yearly, approximately half the dead are male. How can we hallucinate “bhakti benefit” for them? And 760,000 of the total annual kill are little calves, the “vealers” or “bobby calves,” as they are known in various parts of the dairy world.

City people take note: to produce milk, a dairy cow needs to be either pregnant or nursing. Therefore the mothers are made to birth a calf each year until their milk production falls below profitable levels. That means 3 to 5 years. Once the mother’s yearly gifts slip—in Australia, below 4,500 litres (1188 gallons)—she dies. 

Most of the male calves and some females are “surplus” to the farmer’s needs. This “excess” or “unwanted byproduct” cannot remain alive. You see, dairy calves do not grow as fast as beef calves, and their flesh, when mature, is considered unsatisfactory quality to justify the expense farmers would have paid to maintain them.  

Immediately after birth, the “bobby calves” are removed from their mother and hand-fed. At merely 5 days old, they ride to the slaughterhouse, regardless of the hardships of the journey.

In Australia, the dairy industry allows these 5-day-old newborns to be unfed for 30 hours and transported for up to 12 hours, to be killed. 

We should note that the animal humane society in Australia, the RSPCA, advocates compassion, urging farmers to increase the death-wait of calves from 5 days after birth to 10. The RSPCA also promotes heightened sensitivity: slaughter the newborns within 12 hours of their last feed rather than 30. Mercy in the Age of Darkness.

Without fear of condemnation, bhakti practitioners should make an informed personal choice about how and whether to cope with the milk problem. Regardless of our chosen option, please, let’s retire the tragic tale about the slaughtered cow receiving spiritual benefit when her milk is offered.

Free Your Tongue, and Your Mind Will Follow
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Doing your daily chanting, you hit a wall. You know what that feels like. Suddenly you are aware that whatever resolve you had to heart-fully, attentively chant has gradually vanished. Check out the tongue—it’s sluggish, obstinate, even defiant: “No more holy name for now! Down with your beads, finger them later.” 

The mind then monstrously expands, swallowing you up, as it dictates your immediate priorities and goals. Of course, the mind is also working its mayhem on  the long-term, but that we pretend not to see or acknowledge.

Remember Rupa Goswami’s explanation in Nectar of Instruction, Sri Upadeshamrita (7). The tongue is afflicted by avidya, the nescience potency of the Supreme Absolute Truth. Therefore, although the Hare Krishna mantra is inherently, wholly, and eternally sweet, like sugar candy, our tongue, mired in the swamps of illusion, tastes the mahamantra as bitter medicine. “Honestly, most of the time it’s not so juicy, but I’ll try to force a few rounds out now–do the rest later.”

Consider the resistance-battle the rebelling tongue, teamed with the feverish mind, throws at you, the spirit soul, as a chance to cry out more for Krishna’s mercy. The fading of your will to chant is an opportunity to realize more your utter helplessness and dependency, as a spiritual infant.

Beg for the attention of the Panca-tattva to get the locomotion of your ailing tongue vibrating the mahamantra again—the spiritually healthy tongue’s natural constitutional position. 

Blast through that mentally concocted wall, fabricated by lifetimes of material desires, leading to futile karmic striving.

Remember this, too: The Panca-tattva, by their dancing, made it easier for us to drink the nectar of the Love Supreme. They make it possible that the more we taste, the more our thirst increases.

Greed for Krishna: life’s greatest luxury.

Too Serious? Some Disappearance Day Thoughts
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Grave occasions can be intimidating, especially for today’s entertainment-addicted human beings. Proud of squandering our days in frivolity, whether makeshift or sophisticated, we long for convivial mirth and merriment. Oh, to be known as the life of the party . . .  

Yet, our possessing the human form of life is a grave reality—a  weightiness we should constantly address. Lord Chaitanya’s process of chanting, dancing, honouring spiritual food, and hearing philosophy accomplishes the miracle of combining zestful bliss with profound soberness.

Upon the disappearance day celebration of my spiritual grandfather, His Divine Grace Srila Bhaktisiddhanta Sarasvati Thakura, I revisited the last instructions he imparted to his disciples, December 23, 1936, a week before departing this world: 

“We only cherish one desire in our hearts: to sacrifice this body, which is only a lump of matter, in the fire of the sankirtan yajna of Lord Sri Chaitanya and His associates. We do not wish to be heroes by dint of our action, bravery or religiosity. But let this be our real identity life after life: that we are specks of dust under the lotus feet of Sri Rupa. Let that mean everything to us. The Bhaktivinode current will never be stemmed. Please take up the mission of preaching the desire of Bhaktivinode with greater enthusiasm.”

For me, these words have become a meditation: recognition and stature—what to speak of fame—is not where I want to go. Let me learn to aspire to be that speck of dust, under the feet of the parampara, the chain of my preceptors beginning with Lord Krishna Himself. 

Then, I recall the words of Srila Prabhupada, my eternal father,  concluding his Vyasa-puja offering to Srila Bhaktisiddhanta Sarasvati Thakur, February 1936:

“Personally I have no hope for any direct service for the coming crores of births of the sojourn of my life, but I am confident that some day or other I shall be delivered from this mire of delusion in which I am at present so deeply sunk. Therefore let me with all my earnestness pray at the lotus feet of my divine master to allow me to suffer the lot for which I am destined due to my past misdoings, but to let me have this power of recollection: that I am nothing but a tiny servant of the Almighty Absolute Godhead, realised through the unflinching mercy of my divine master. Let me therefore bow down at his lotus feet with all the humility at my command.”

Heavyweight, I know. But such solemn spiritual declarations are actually the essence of bliss, because they let soar the boundless joy of real freedom and unlimited happiness. I see the light at the end of the tunnel: satisfaction at being a humble, genuine servant of Krishna’s servants.

Proud of a Personal Debt Burden
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Who relishes drowning in debt? Held captive, whether financially or emotionally, chained and bound by outstanding payments, is not how we want our merry life to proceed. 

Soaking in the imaginary security of the illusory energy, conditioned souls cherish the maya consciousness of “born free and living easy—no holds on me.” 

Debts of whatever type mean we are not in control—someone or something else has us under the gun. Fearing financial slavery as well as someone emotionally putting the screws on us, we want our life unfettered. Especially in the West, we have been trained to resist relationship blackmail. 

The Age of Darkness standard demands we think that our personal existence resides fully in our own hands: “I don’t owe anyone anything—I’m not obligated to even tell you the time of the day!” The supposed peace formula: “You live your life, I live mine.”

While visiting Shantipur, in the Gaura-mandala, a deeper realisation of my eternal indebtedness to our spiritual preceptors enveloped me. I am inalterably insolvent, permanently behind in payments.

Where Adwaita Acharya worshipped and begged for the descent of Lord Chaitanya, I now sit, partnering in reading and kirtan with HH Niranjana Swami, Acyuta-priya Prabhu, and a few other devotees. 

Here, at the site of Adwaita Acharya’s house, immeasurably extraordinary personalities converged in full ecstasy of love of Krishna. Lord Chaitanya, Lord Nityananda, and their associates gathered here for chanting, dancing, and feasting. As described in Caitanya-caritamrta, at this spot Mother Sachi saw Lord Chaitanya for the first time after He accepted sannyasa.

The seed of ecstatic love of Krishna, Madhavendra Puri, visited this place too. That seed sprouted into the tree of ecstatic love, Chaitanya Mahaprabhu.

Before leaving India to come to the West, Srila Prabhupada would take the train up from up Kolkata, to visit Adwaita Acarya’s homesite and meditate on executing the order of his spiritual master.

Owing to all this superlative bhakti, this heritage of pure love of Krishna, my lowly self can chant the mahamantra today. With all the gravity and gratitude my lowly self can command, I wholeheartedly accept the burden of divine debt for which there will never be relief.

Hungry to Understand Mayapur?
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Taking the plane, car, or train to the land of Lord Chaitanya? Let’s get into the spiritual technology. Don’t worry—it’s not too complex. 

Our great predecessor-acharya Srila Bhaktivinode Thakur explained that as a result of spiritual advancement, the all-spiritual realm of Navadvipa-dhama, including Mayapur, can appear to us via three avenues: dreams, meditation, and naked eyesight.

You see, the entirety of Gaura-mandala, the apparently geophysical area surrounding Lord Chaitanya’s pastimes, is cent percent spiritual. Even the water, the land, the trees defy material categorisation. 

We all know that unqualified eyes see just ordinary aspects of material nature. Nevertheless, the elements composing Sri Sri Gaura-Nitai’s essentially nonmaterial area are eternity, complete knowledge, and ever-escalating bliss. 

Spiritual scientists know that these three spiritual ingredients are the gifts of Krishna’s internal potency, swarupa-shakti. This internal energy manifests in three divisions, always present. One of those three “departments” is the “eternal-existence potency,” sandhini-shakti, which attains its “peak performance” by manifesting the eternal dhama, the nonmaterial neighbourhood or spiritual base supporting and facilitating the supreme pastimes.

Materialists suffer from overconfidence in the power and scope of their tiny intelligence. Gunned down by ignorance and illusion, they observe in Mayapur, Navadvipa-dhama, and the Gaura-mandala only the activities of material nature. 

A common example our acharyas give us is the sun. Have the clouds truly covered the sun itself or have they simply covered only our vision? Blinded by the fog of Krishna’s illusory, external potency, the bewildered conditioned soul sees the Gaura-mandala, the entire pastime-arena of Lord Chaitanya, as just routine geography, the usual product of material nature.

How to break out of this trap? Srila Bhaktivinode Thakur reminds us that the master of the department eternally manifesting and supporting the dhama, the boss of that sandhini-shakti, is Lord Nityananda Himself. Get His mercy and ye shall indeed see—the full spiritual reality of Mayapur, Navadvipa-dhama, and the Gaura-mandala.

I Love My Mind, Don’t You Love Yours?
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Yes, life will be peaceful when we trust our mind, relaxing and basking in it. Loosen the reins—in fact, drop them. After all, it’s our very own mind, near and dear, worshipable and adorable. So my mind tells me.

Material existence, the Bhagavatam teaches, is a drama that happens through the mind. Fabricating superficial stuff known as happiness and distress, the mind drags us into one existential absorption after another, swinging us from body to body. 

As Krishna explains in the Gita, higher than the mind is the intelligence, and higher still is the soul. Bhakti-yoga means to  use the mind to think of Krishna and His service (the same) and to supervise the mind with its immediate superior——deliberative intelligence. Then gradually our real self the soul becomes uncovered, and as we become more advanced, the Supersoul begins to personally educate us.

On our way to Krishna, Sukadeva Goswami gives some crucial advice to bhakti practitioners: 

“After capturing animals, a cunning hunter does not put faith in them, for they might run away. Similarly, those who are advanced in spiritual life do not put faith in the mind. Indeed, they always remain vigilant and watch the mind’s action.

“All the learned scholars have given their opinion. The mind is by nature very restless, and one should not make friends with it. If we place full confidence in the mind, it may cheat us at any moment.” (S. bhag 5.6.2-3)

Let’s protest. 

Isn’t this warning mainly for new devotees, “new believers”? I’ve been around for a while now—time to just “let it be.”

Give me a break, after all these years, I’ve internalized all the spiritual practices, so I don’t have to be regular anymore. I just want to be a good human being, who does mostly as everyone does while believing, of course, in God, Krishna.

Foolish devotee, listen to Visvanath Cakravarti Thakur detail how the mind, like a chameleon, constantly assumes a new condition. One moment it flickers pure, the next, impure. 

A  cunning cheater shows friendship to trusting persons; then robs and kills them. Similarly the mind of the conditioned soul sometimes demonstrates its potential purity, shaking free of lust and anger, submitting to devotional activities. Eventually, one unsuspecting day, after the devotee has slackened and eased, suddenly the material mind storms back, betraying us, as we drown in a tsunami of material pollutants. Down goes the bhakti practioner. 

Cakravartipada further enunciates how when long-term yogis maintain an ongoing faith in the mind, such trust and confidence will eventually reveal itself to have drained away their accumulated potencies, corroding their austerities. In time, the escalating ugly truth pounces, catching them completely off-guard.

Sukadeva Goswami (5.6.4-5) continues his crucial instruction:

“An unchaste woman is very easily carried away by paramours, and it sometimes happens that her husband is violently killed by her paramours. If the yogi gives his mind a chance and does not restrain it, his mind will give facility to enemies like lust, anger and greed, and they will doubtlessly kill the yogi.

“The mind is the root cause of lust, anger, pride, greed, lamentation, illusion and fear. Combined, these constitute bondage to fruitive activity. What learned man would put faith in the mind?”

We shall ignore this essential advice at our own peril.

I Love My Mind, Don’t You Love Yours?
→ Devamrita Swami's Facebook notes

Yes, life will be peaceful when we trust our mind, relaxing and basking in it. Loosen the reins—in fact, drop them. After all, it’s our very own mind, near and dear, worshipable and adorable. So my mind tells me.

Material existence, the Bhagavatam teaches, is a drama that happens through the mind. Fabricating superficial stuff known as happiness and distress, the mind drags us into one existential absorption after another, swinging us from body to body. 

As Krishna explains in the Gita, higher than the mind is the intelligence, and higher still is the soul. Bhakti-yoga means to  use the mind to think of Krishna and His service (the same) and to supervise the mind with its immediate superior——deliberative intelligence. Then gradually our real self the soul becomes uncovered, and as we become more advanced, the Supersoul begins to personally educate us.

On our way to Krishna, Sukadeva Goswami gives some crucial advice to bhakti practitioners: 

“After capturing animals, a cunning hunter does not put faith in them, for they might run away. Similarly, those who are advanced in spiritual life do not put faith in the mind. Indeed, they always remain vigilant and watch the mind’s action.

“All the learned scholars have given their opinion. The mind is by nature very restless, and one should not make friends with it. If we place full confidence in the mind, it may cheat us at any moment.” (S. bhag 5.6.2-3)

Let’s protest. 

Isn’t this warning mainly for new devotees, “new believers”? I’ve been around for a while now—time to just “let it be.”

Give me a break, after all these years, I’ve internalized all the spiritual practices, so I don’t have to be regular anymore. I just want to be a good human being, who does mostly as everyone does while believing, of course, in God, Krishna.

Foolish devotee, listen to Visvanath Cakravarti Thakur detail how the mind, like a chameleon, constantly assumes a new condition. One moment it flickers pure, the next, impure. 

A  cunning cheater shows friendship to trusting persons; then robs and kills them. Similarly the mind of the conditioned soul sometimes demonstrates its potential purity, shaking free of lust and anger, submitting to devotional activities. Eventually, one unsuspecting day, after the devotee has slackened and eased, suddenly the material mind storms back, betraying us, as we drown in a tsunami of material pollutants. Down goes the bhakti practioner. 

Cakravartipada further enunciates how when long-term yogis maintain an ongoing faith in the mind, such trust and confidence will eventually reveal itself to have drained away their accumulated potencies, corroding their austerities. In time, the escalating ugly truth pounces, catching them completely off-guard.

Sukadeva Goswami (5.6.4-5) continues his crucial instruction:

“An unchaste woman is very easily carried away by paramours, and it sometimes happens that her husband is violently killed by her paramours. If the yogi gives his mind a chance and does not restrain it, his mind will give facility to enemies like lust, anger and greed, and they will doubtlessly kill the yogi.

“The mind is the root cause of lust, anger, pride, greed, lamentation, illusion and fear. Combined, these constitute bondage to fruitive activity. What learned man would put faith in the mind?”

We shall ignore this essential advice at our own peril.

Ukraine Festival Aftermath
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The greatest transcendental show on earth just ended, bigger and better every year. More than double the devotees at the Mayapur festival, four times the population of an average country town, the ISKCON festival in Ukraine far surpasses anything else in planetary ISKCON. The festival excels in organisational prowess also.

The vast majority of the attendees come from Ukraine, supplemented by a strong showing from neighbouring Russia, plus a tiny sprinkling of devotees from first world countries like the UK., Canada, Australia, etc. 

During the festival Radhanatha Swami commented to me that the Ukrainian bhakti-yogis “take nothing for granted.” Even just a smile, in passing, from a visiting senior devotee becomes immortalised, never to be forgotten. As I pointed out last year, ISKCON life among devotees in the first world can become quite familiar and jaded, regarding gurus and disciples. The subtle mentality that sometimes creeps in: “He visits here all the time—what’s the big deal . . .” 

To Niranjana Swami, the GBC and spiritual surcharger for Ukraine, I confided my realisation: “I’m here just for my own purification.” Hopefully the embarrassing sincerity and open-heartedness of the Ukrainian devotees will rub off on me. Their freshness and purity of purpose brings down upon them the blessings of Krishna. Maybe some of Krishna’s mercy will rain on me also.

As Krishna says in the Gita (5.11): “The yogis, abandoning attachment, act with body, mind, intelligence and even with the senses, only for the purpose of purification.”

Traveling through Ukraine, now visiting Lugansk, near the Russian border, I meditate on this Gita verse, seeking to make it my friend and guide.

Ukraine Festival Aftermath
→ Devamrita Swami's Facebook notes

The greatest transcendental show on earth just ended, bigger and better every year. More than double the devotees at the Mayapur festival, four times the population of an average country town, the ISKCON festival in Ukraine far surpasses anything else in planetary ISKCON. The festival excels in organisational prowess also.

The vast majority of the attendees come from Ukraine, supplemented by a strong showing from neighbouring Russia, plus a tiny sprinkling of devotees from first world countries like the UK., Canada, Australia, etc. 

During the festival Radhanatha Swami commented to me that the Ukrainian bhakti-yogis “take nothing for granted.” Even just a smile, in passing, from a visiting senior devotee becomes immortalised, never to be forgotten. As I pointed out last year, ISKCON life among devotees in the first world can become quite familiar and jaded, regarding gurus and disciples. The subtle mentality that sometimes creeps in: “He visits here all the time—what’s the big deal . . .” 

To Niranjana Swami, the GBC and spiritual surcharger for Ukraine, I confided my realisation: “I’m here just for my own purification.” Hopefully the embarrassing sincerity and open-heartedness of the Ukrainian devotees will rub off on me. Their freshness and purity of purpose brings down upon them the blessings of Krishna. Maybe some of Krishna’s mercy will rain on me also.

As Krishna says in the Gita (5.11): “The yogis, abandoning attachment, act with body, mind, intelligence and even with the senses, only for the purpose of purification.”

Traveling through Ukraine, now visiting Lugansk, near the Russian border, I meditate on this Gita verse, seeking to make it my friend and guide.

Offering to My Eternal Spiritual Father
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Dear Srila Prabhupada,

Please accept my prostrated obeisances in the dust of your lotus feet.

“It’s all your mercy” is common Vaishnava parlance, in the ISKCON world and beyond. This catch-all response can be anything—from routine religious jargon, to heartfelt elegance, to the deepest realisation of one’s utter spiritual dependency.

Srila Bhaktivinode Thakura writes in his song to Gurudeva, “When I examine myself, I find nothing of value. Therefore your mercy is essential to me. If you are not merciful, I shall simply weep and weep, and I shall not maintain my life.”

I often wondered about how he and, of course, you actually feel this declaration so extraordinarily, as your entire being.

As the years of my insignificant life roll by, I increasingly realise that any perceived faults are all mine, and any credit is all yours. Is this one short life enough to fully grasp at least half the extent of your mercy? What to speak of your disciples, even grand disciples, and their followers testify to your munificence in their life.

During your days with us in the seventies, you once commented that physical association with the guru was for neophytes. I thought at that time,”Well, all glories to the sublime theology of vani-sanga, but so that the physical association with your divine presence will always be mine, let me always remain a neophyte.”

Of course, better we hold to what you write in a purport (Cc. Madhya 18.99): “Unless one is enlightened by the knowledge given by the spiritual master, he cannot see things as they are, even though he remains with the spiritual master.”

In 1977, upon your departing the ordinary vision of this world, I was convinced I had failed to attain you. Concluding that any chance for a close relationship with you had left along with your physical presence, I resigned myself to helping the next generation of devotees not to miss out as I had. Vigorously urging your fledgling grand disciples to value the physical presence of their guru with utmost care, I would instruct them to seek every opportunity to have it.

After your departure, the constantly overpowering strains, agonies, and dangers of preaching behind the former Iron Curtain consumed my life—no time to continue lamenting about your disappearance. But during such bleak years there, when the atheistic communists, sure of their permanence, ruled with iron fists of terror their sealed-off kingdoms, your vani association caught this young foolish fugitive-devotee by surprise.

In testimony to your kindness upon even a insignificant jiva, I submit this poem written way back in the eighties, during my Iron Curtain years, for the glorification of your 2013 Vyasa-puja.

East Europe Bhajana

Part One (1977)

Sailing with devotees on the ISKCON-Los Angeles sea

hoping His Divine Grace, the captain,

would personally lead me

With good faith I endeavored

every day

Sure that his pure glance

would soon cast my way

Then he left

though I was still immature

My hopes for his divine sanga

crashed to the floor

Too young to have been with him

Too old to forget him

Certainly this was a very precarious situation

Alas, come what may . . .

the mission must push on

Maybe in fifty lifetimes . . .

I’ll again see his form

Part Two (1978-79)

Sailing alone on a most dangerous sea

with no hope that Srila Prabhupada

would come and rescue me

My ship is very tiny

yet the ego-mast is tall

I’m completely insignificant

and my service is so small

Naturally Srila Prabhupada ignored such a fool

I wasn’t worthy of the chance to be his tool

Part Three (1980)

Sailing alone on a most dangerous sea

certain that Srila Prabhupada 

will never find me

Smash!

Down comes the door to my

sealed-off heart

“You can’t come in here,” I protest

“It’s too late to start!”

“Surrender to your spiritual master,”

you majestically declare,

“About your rationalizations,

I definitely don’t care”

Part Four (1982)

Sailing alone on a most dangerous sea

Sometimes does Srila Prabhupada stand

right beside me?

Becoming a little eager to serve him

according to his direction

Why does Srila Prabhupada shower

such care and affection?

Without his instructions

I’m a useless fool

Maybe one day I can actually

become his tool

O Srila Prabhupada!

I write of your mercy out of 

great astonishment

Please forgive me, your aspiring servant, for my offenses

Since those excruciating days, let us hope that, by your grace, I have made some advancement. Now, more than a quarter century later, this microscopic servitor simply wonders what your real devotees experience—what kind of nectar you shower upon them.

In Sri Caitanya-caritamrita, Adi-lila Chapter 5, Srila Krishnadas Kaviraja Goswami confesses that the attributes of Lord Nityananda, who acted as his guru, impelled him to become a madman writing of Lord Nityananda’s mercy.

Though nothing compared to Kaviraja Goswami, yet according to the measure of our own realizations, why don’t we publicize the merciful presence of Srila Prabhupada in every ISKCON devotee’s life, through his vani-sanga, especially via his books.

The Goswami explains that generally it is not proper to reveal an account as spiritually esoteric as his, “for it should be kept as confidential as the Vedas, yet I shall speak of it to make His mercy known to all.”

Similarly, whether highly advanced or neophyte, let us all broadcast the eternal relevance of Srila Prabhupada’s mercy for all generations of ISKCON devotees.

Clarifying his motivations, Kaviraja Goswami explains: “O Lord Nityänanda, I write of Your mercy out of great exultation. Please forgive me for my offenses.”

He concludes: “Who in this world but Nityänanda could show His mercy to such an abominable person as me?”

Seeking to follow these perfect parampara footsteps, in my imperfect capacity, I end: Who in this world but you, Srila Prabhupada, could show his mercy and kindness to such a guilty transgressor as me?”

Offering to My Eternal Spiritual Father
→ Devamrita Swami's Facebook notes

Dear Srila Prabhupada,

Please accept my prostrated obeisances in the dust of your lotus feet.

“It’s all your mercy” is common Vaishnava parlance, in the ISKCON world and beyond. This catch-all response can be anything—from routine religious jargon, to heartfelt elegance, to the deepest realisation of one’s utter spiritual dependency.

Srila Bhaktivinode Thakura writes in his song to Gurudeva, “When I examine myself, I find nothing of value. Therefore your mercy is essential to me. If you are not merciful, I shall simply weep and weep, and I shall not maintain my life.”

I often wondered about how he and, of course, you actually feel this declaration so extraordinarily, as your entire being.

As the years of my insignificant life roll by, I increasingly realise that any perceived faults are all mine, and any credit is all yours. Is this one short life enough to fully grasp at least half the extent of your mercy? What to speak of your disciples, even grand disciples, and their followers testify to your munificence in their life.

During your days with us in the seventies, you once commented that physical association with the guru was for neophytes. I thought at that time,”Well, all glories to the sublime theology of vani-sanga, but so that the physical association with your divine presence will always be mine, let me always remain a neophyte.”

Of course, better we hold to what you write in a purport (Cc. Madhya 18.99): “Unless one is enlightened by the knowledge given by the spiritual master, he cannot see things as they are, even though he remains with the spiritual master.”

In 1977, upon your departing the ordinary vision of this world, I was convinced I had failed to attain you. Concluding that any chance for a close relationship with you had left along with your physical presence, I resigned myself to helping the next generation of devotees not to miss out as I had. Vigorously urging your fledgling grand disciples to value the physical presence of their guru with utmost care, I would instruct them to seek every opportunity to have it.

After your departure, the constantly overpowering strains, agonies, and dangers of preaching behind the former Iron Curtain consumed my life—no time to continue lamenting about your disappearance. But during such bleak years there, when the atheistic communists, sure of their permanence, ruled with iron fists of terror their sealed-off kingdoms, your vani association caught this young foolish fugitive-devotee by surprise.

In testimony to your kindness upon even a insignificant jiva, I submit this poem written way back in the eighties, during my Iron Curtain years, for the glorification of your 2013 Vyasa-puja.

East Europe Bhajana

Part One (1977)

Sailing with devotees on the ISKCON-Los Angeles sea

hoping His Divine Grace, the captain,

would personally lead me

With good faith I endeavored

every day

Sure that his pure glance

would soon cast my way

Then he left

though I was still immature

My hopes for his divine sanga

crashed to the floor

Too young to have been with him

Too old to forget him

Certainly this was a very precarious situation

Alas, come what may . . .

the mission must push on

Maybe in fifty lifetimes . . .

I’ll again see his form

Part Two (1978-79)

Sailing alone on a most dangerous sea

with no hope that Srila Prabhupada

would come and rescue me

My ship is very tiny

yet the ego-mast is tall

I’m completely insignificant

and my service is so small

Naturally Srila Prabhupada ignored such a fool

I wasn’t worthy of the chance to be his tool

Part Three (1980)

Sailing alone on a most dangerous sea

certain that Srila Prabhupada 

will never find me

Smash!

Down comes the door to my

sealed-off heart

“You can’t come in here,” I protest

“It’s too late to start!”

“Surrender to your spiritual master,”

you majestically declare,

“About your rationalizations,

I definitely don’t care”

Part Four (1982)

Sailing alone on a most dangerous sea

Sometimes does Srila Prabhupada stand

right beside me?

Becoming a little eager to serve him

according to his direction

Why does Srila Prabhupada shower

such care and affection?

Without his instructions

I’m a useless fool

Maybe one day I can actually

become his tool

O Srila Prabhupada!

I write of your mercy out of 

great astonishment

Please forgive me, your aspiring servant, for my offenses

Since those excruciating days, let us hope that, by your grace, I have made some advancement. Now, more than a quarter century later, this microscopic servitor simply wonders what your real devotees experience—what kind of nectar you shower upon them.

In Sri Caitanya-caritamrita, Adi-lila Chapter 5, Srila Krishnadas Kaviraja Goswami confesses that the attributes of Lord Nityananda, who acted as his guru, impelled him to become a madman writing of Lord Nityananda’s mercy.

Though nothing compared to Kaviraja Goswami, yet according to the measure of our own realizations, why don’t we publicize the merciful presence of Srila Prabhupada in every ISKCON devotee’s life, through his vani-sanga, especially via his books.

The Goswami explains that generally it is not proper to reveal an account as spiritually esoteric as his, “for it should be kept as confidential as the Vedas, yet I shall speak of it to make His mercy known to all.”

Similarly, whether highly advanced or neophyte, let us all broadcast the eternal relevance of Srila Prabhupada’s mercy for all generations of ISKCON devotees.

Clarifying his motivations, Kaviraja Goswami explains: “O Lord Nityänanda, I write of Your mercy out of great exultation. Please forgive me for my offenses.”

He concludes: “Who in this world but Nityänanda could show His mercy to such an abominable person as me?”

Seeking to follow these perfect parampara footsteps, in my imperfect capacity, I end: Who in this world but you, Srila Prabhupada, could show his mercy and kindness to such a guilty transgressor as me?”

Back on Facebook
→ Devamrita Swami's Facebook notes

“Whenever you come, the earth moves,” one of our Bhakti Lounge members in Wellington, New Zealand told me. No, he wasn’t simply flattering me.

Though I change global locations rapidly, somehow I managed to be in Wellington each time in the past four weeks when a major earthquake struck.

The first time, a chilly (for New Zealand) Sunday, July 21, I was staying on the third floor of an apartment building. While amid the most vulnerable bathroom situation you can imagine, suddenly I felt and saw the building totter and sway, as if it had roller balls underneath the foundation.

What to do? 

What kind of world is this . . . I thought.

You can’t even relieve yourself in peace!

Clad in only a thin cloth around the waist, should I run out of the flat, downstairs and outside in the cold? 

Chanting Hare Krishna, as the initial major shockwaves seemed to subside, I decided that if indeed I was to give up my body at that time, the cadaver might as well be clean. So completing my bathroom rituals, I showered while wondering what comes next—one never knows when earthquakes are truly over, when the worst has actually passed. 

The tremors continued for the next 24 hours. The Sunday festival programme at the Bhakti Lounge went ahead as usual, and Krishna’s guests showed up as normal.

Now that I am earthquake experienced, I deeply sympathise with anyone who has shaken through one. But another?

After traveling overseas, a month later I arrived back in Wellington just in time to catch a repeat performance, August 16—this one stronger than before.

Though both hit the upper 6 range on the quake scale, Wellington, unlike Christchurch in 2011, incurred no human fatalities, injuries, or collapsed buildings. Tremors continued through the day and night, two exceeding 5 on the scale.

Srimad-bhagavatam (10.14.58) reminds us: “For those who have accepted the boat of the lotus feet of the Lord, who is the shelter of the cosmic manifestation and is famous as Murari, the enemy of the Mura demon, the ocean of the material world is like the water contained in a calf’s hoof-print. Their goal is param padam, Vaikuntha, the place where there are no material miseries, not the place where there is danger at every step.”

Where is safety in this world—maybe off the ground, in the air?

Consider this news reported a few months ago in the Times of India: 

During an Air India flight over the ocean from Bangkok to Delhi, with 166 passengers on board, the first officer (co-pilot), excusing himself from the cockpit for a bathroom break, decided to let a flight attendant (cabin crew member) occupy his seat at the controls. 

A few minutes later the Captain also left the cockpit, after giving the now two flight attendants in the cockpit instant lessons on how to fly. 

Leaving the flight attendants at the controls by themselves, the pilot and co-pilot retreated to the business class section of the cabin, reclined back, and went to sleep. 

Forty minutes into their snooze, one of the flight attendants at the controls shut off the autopilot by mistake, thereby plunging the aircraft into danger. Forced out of their slumber, the pilots rushed back to the cockpit. 

All four perpetrators—pilot, co-pilot, and the two flight attendants—were de-rostered and later suspended.

Welcome to the enjoyable, secure material world. 

Back on Facebook
→ Devamrita Swami's Facebook notes

“Whenever you come, the earth moves,” one of our Bhakti Lounge members in Wellington, New Zealand told me. No, he wasn’t simply flattering me.

Though I change global locations rapidly, somehow I managed to be in Wellington each time in the past four weeks when a major earthquake struck.

The first time, a chilly (for New Zealand) Sunday, July 21, I was staying on the third floor of an apartment building. While amid the most vulnerable bathroom situation you can imagine, suddenly I felt and saw the building totter and sway, as if it had roller balls underneath the foundation.

What to do? 

What kind of world is this . . . I thought.

You can’t even relieve yourself in peace!

Clad in only a thin cloth around the waist, should I run out of the flat, downstairs and outside in the cold? 

Chanting Hare Krishna, as the initial major shockwaves seemed to subside, I decided that if indeed I was to give up my body at that time, the cadaver might as well be clean. So completing my bathroom rituals, I showered while wondering what comes next—one never knows when earthquakes are truly over, when the worst has actually passed. 

The tremors continued for the next 24 hours. The Sunday festival programme at the Bhakti Lounge went ahead as usual, and Krishna’s guests showed up as normal.

Now that I am earthquake experienced, I deeply sympathise with anyone who has shaken through one. But another?

After traveling overseas, a month later I arrived back in Wellington just in time to catch a repeat performance, August 16—this one stronger than before.

Though both hit the upper 6 range on the quake scale, Wellington, unlike Christchurch in 2011, incurred no human fatalities, injuries, or collapsed buildings. Tremors continued through the day and night, two exceeding 5 on the scale.

Srimad-bhagavatam (10.14.58) reminds us: “For those who have accepted the boat of the lotus feet of the Lord, who is the shelter of the cosmic manifestation and is famous as Murari, the enemy of the Mura demon, the ocean of the material world is like the water contained in a calf’s hoof-print. Their goal is param padam, Vaikuntha, the place where there are no material miseries, not the place where there is danger at every step.”

Where is safety in this world—maybe off the ground, in the air?

Consider this news reported a few months ago in the Times of India: 

During an Air India flight over the ocean from Bangkok to Delhi, with 166 passengers on board, the first officer (co-pilot), excusing himself from the cockpit for a bathroom break, decided to let a flight attendant (cabin crew member) occupy his seat at the controls. 

A few minutes later the Captain also left the cockpit, after giving the now two flight attendants in the cockpit instant lessons on how to fly. 

Leaving the flight attendants at the controls by themselves, the pilot and co-pilot retreated to the business class section of the cabin, reclined back, and went to sleep. 

Forty minutes into their snooze, one of the flight attendants at the controls shut off the autopilot by mistake, thereby plunging the aircraft into danger. Forced out of their slumber, the pilots rushed back to the cockpit. 

All four perpetrators—pilot, co-pilot, and the two flight attendants—were de-rostered and later suspended.

Welcome to the enjoyable, secure material world. 

Who’s the Bhakti Buster?
→ Devamrita Swami's Facebook notes

When Krishna seems unattainable, and advancement in His service seems light years away, frustration and resentment may subtly slip into our heart.

“Why is this process, which makes so much sense, so hard?” we cry out.

Then we read verses like the following: 

“Devotional Perfection is very difficult to attain for two reasons. First, unless one is attached to Krishna, he cannot attain devotional perfection even if he renders devotional service for a long time. Second, Krishna does not easily deliver  perfection in devotional service.” (Cc. Madhya 24.172)

“Just see!” we tell ourselves, downcast and downhearted. “I’m justified in my discouragement. Real bhakti is the greatest treasure, but almost impossible to attain.”

A deeper meaning, however, resides in this verse. 

It’s telling us that Krishna, the supreme expert in love, knows what He wants from us. 

And He knows how to get it. 

What He wants is to see that we are genuinely sincere, serious, and without ulterior motives. Wouldn’t you want someone to love you in that way? Doesn’t your heart long for that?

So then why blame Him, the supreme connoisseur of real love, for knowing exactly how to easily produce the greatest love affair? 

Srila Prabhupada explains in the purport that when bhakti endeavors radiate sincerity, seriousness, and freedom from submerged material agendas, then devotional success is easily achieved. I repeat, easily achieved.

Let’s admit it: we are the ones who bust up our bhakti and impede it. And we can be the ones to make it all so easy, especially as happy-hearted servants of the servants of Sri Caitanya Mahaprabhu, the Supreme Bhakti Ease-maker.

Who’s the Bhakti Buster?
→ Devamrita Swami's Facebook notes

When Krishna seems unattainable, and advancement in His service seems light years away, frustration and resentment may subtly slip into our heart.

“Why is this process, which makes so much sense, so hard?” we cry out.

Then we read verses like the following: 

“Devotional Perfection is very difficult to attain for two reasons. First, unless one is attached to Krishna, he cannot attain devotional perfection even if he renders devotional service for a long time. Second, Krishna does not easily deliver  perfection in devotional service.” (Cc. Madhya 24.172)

“Just see!” we tell ourselves, downcast and downhearted. “I’m justified in my discouragement. Real bhakti is the greatest treasure, but almost impossible to attain.”

A deeper meaning, however, resides in this verse. 

It’s telling us that Krishna, the supreme expert in love, knows what He wants from us. 

And He knows how to get it. 

What He wants is to see that we are genuinely sincere, serious, and without ulterior motives. Wouldn’t you want someone to love you in that way? Doesn’t your heart long for that?

So then why blame Him, the supreme connoisseur of real love, for knowing exactly how to easily produce the greatest love affair? 

Srila Prabhupada explains in the purport that when bhakti endeavors radiate sincerity, seriousness, and freedom from submerged material agendas, then devotional success is easily achieved. I repeat, easily achieved.

Let’s admit it: we are the ones who bust up our bhakti and impede it. And we can be the ones to make it all so easy, especially as happy-hearted servants of the servants of Sri Caitanya Mahaprabhu, the Supreme Bhakti Ease-maker.

Escaping the Transcendental Interferer
→ Devamrita Swami's Facebook notes

“Whatever you need to believe in, go for it,” people often say now. “Hold to whatever you need, think what you need to think, be what you need to be”—just so you can make it through the day and night.

Put your faith in something: water skiing, cafe hopping, Krishna, careerism, Buddha, sensualism, traveling,  Jesus, scuba diving—whatever works for you.

Simply remember: no matter what you believe, it’s all about you. Your body, your mind. After all, who knows anything about the atma, the soul. And if there is God, didn’t this Great Whoever give us these bodies and minds to enjoy?

Take whatever you need; give what you feel you can give. This is dharma in the Age of Darkness. Whatever you believe, don’t admit to any control over you by a supreme being. Say it loudly—”My life is my affair!” Say the same thing softly—if you want people to know you as humble. 

As one materialistic philosopher said, real happiness is the feeling that your power increases while resistance to your power and plans is overcome.

Our problem with Krishna is that He is too active and too close. First, there are His enviable original pastimes as the supreme enjoyer,  in the spiritual world as well as when He tours the material world. Then, He also has an expansion in our heart, regardless of what body we take. 

Moreover, He’s not lazy in our heart, as Srila Prabhupada once said. He’s doing things, as the Witness and Permitter. Along with facilitating our desires, He’s trying to influence us. The thought of His presence in our heart, advising, coaxing, campaigning, agitates our materialistic consciousness—we want to rebel.

“You see, my heart is actually my own affair, my personal business, my own realm—private, fenced. To know that Supersoul is there, at the core of my being . . . well . . . Lord in the heart . . . give me space . . . autonomy, to do my life my way.”

Escaping the Transcendental Interferer
→ Devamrita Swami's Facebook notes

“Whatever you need to believe in, go for it,” people often say now. “Hold to whatever you need, think what you need to think, be what you need to be”—just so you can make it through the day and night.

Put your faith in something: water skiing, cafe hopping, Krishna, careerism, Buddha, sensualism, traveling,  Jesus, scuba diving—whatever works for you.

Simply remember: no matter what you believe, it’s all about you. Your body, your mind. After all, who knows anything about the atma, the soul. And if there is God, didn’t this Great Whoever give us these bodies and minds to enjoy?

Take whatever you need; give what you feel you can give. This is dharma in the Age of Darkness. Whatever you believe, don’t admit to any control over you by a supreme being. Say it loudly—”My life is my affair!” Say the same thing softly—if you want people to know you as humble. 

As one materialistic philosopher said, real happiness is the feeling that your power increases while resistance to your power and plans is overcome.

Our problem with Krishna is that He is too active and too close. First, there are His enviable original pastimes as the supreme enjoyer,  in the spiritual world as well as when He tours the material world. Then, He also has an expansion in our heart, regardless of what body we take. 

Moreover, He’s not lazy in our heart, as Srila Prabhupada once said. He’s doing things, as the Witness and Permitter. Along with facilitating our desires, He’s trying to influence us. The thought of His presence in our heart, advising, coaxing, campaigning, agitates our materialistic consciousness—we want to rebel.

“You see, my heart is actually my own affair, my personal business, my own realm—private, fenced. To know that Supersoul is there, at the core of my being . . . well . . . Lord in the heart . . . give me space . . . autonomy, to do my life my way.”

What You Don’t Want for Your Life
→ Devamrita Swami's Facebook notes

Free we are to be enslaved by our mind and senses, but no actual happiness and satisfaction arise from energetic youthful labours to enjoy. To be young, and young at heart, in a technological society means how to complicate, with gadgets, entanglement in the same old senses and their objects. Youthful bliss is a temporary illusion, lasting as long as a shooting star—sparkling for a few splendid seconds, then swallowed up by the vast darkness of the night sky.

As the Bhagavatam (Canto four, Chapter 27) points out, the zesty youthful enjoyer, once the vigorous party of the senses ends, reluctantly crashes into disillusion and despair for the even more stale remainder of life.

Without spiritual knowledge, the aging conditioned soul’s only alternative to bitterness and cynicism is to try and enjoy vicariously, through the children and grandchildren. Sometimes the depleted hero turns to social welfare work, hoping to accrue some appreciation and self-value, though utterly lacking the spiritual knowledge necessary to actually make a real, lasting difference in someone’s life.

What You Don’t Want for Your Life
→ Devamrita Swami's Facebook notes

Free we are to be enslaved by our mind and senses, but no actual happiness and satisfaction arise from energetic youthful labours to enjoy. To be young, and young at heart, in a technological society means how to complicate, with gadgets, entanglement in the same old senses and their objects. Youthful bliss is a temporary illusion, lasting as long as a shooting star—sparkling for a few splendid seconds, then swallowed up by the vast darkness of the night sky.

As the Bhagavatam (Canto four, Chapter 27) points out, the zesty youthful enjoyer, once the vigorous party of the senses ends, reluctantly crashes into disillusion and despair for the even more stale remainder of life.

Without spiritual knowledge, the aging conditioned soul’s only alternative to bitterness and cynicism is to try and enjoy vicariously, through the children and grandchildren. Sometimes the depleted hero turns to social welfare work, hoping to accrue some appreciation and self-value, though utterly lacking the spiritual knowledge necessary to actually make a real, lasting difference in someone’s life.

That Other Forest
→ Devamrita Swami's Facebook notes

The Forest of Material Enjoyment offers meager and miserly, stingy and mingy sexual gratification in return for our constant struggling with its immense obstacles and exasperating deficiencies. 

You see, on the material platform, living a “balanced life” is impossible, because the uncontrolled mind and senses dictate the whole temporary show.

The other option? Krishna’s supreme playground, the Vrindavana forest, infinitely attracts all five senses. There, purely spiritual sense objects nourish each spiritual sense of the spiritual body. Krishna, of course, leads the way in purely blissful forest adventures. But eternally emember the crucial distinction: He enjoys directly, whereas we, His parts, enjoy by serving and relishing His enjoyment. 

Just by our hearing of how Krishna enjoys the Vrindavana forest brings us precious relief from the blazing forest fire of material existence. What’s more, simply hearing attentively of how Krishna enjoys gradually brings us the supreme dynamic of life: spotless love for Krishna.

Eyes: the stunning beauty of Vrindavana’s forest scenery—trees, flowers, lakes, rivers—gladdens the sense of sight.

Nose: the omnipresent fragrance of lotus flowers enlivens the sense of smell.

Ears: the sounds of birds, bees, and other forest animals enchant the sense of hearing.

Tongue: delightful flavours from the sweet water of transparent lakes, transported by the forest breezes, enliven the sense of taste.

Touch: cooling droplets of water carried from those same forest lakes by those same breezes stimulate the tactile sense.

Krishna feels pleased by the atmosphere of the Vrindavana forest. The Supreme Personality of Pleasure, He personally appreciates how the forest strives to serve Him with pleasure.

Let’s go there.

“The Supreme Personality of Godhead looked over that forest, which resounded with the charming sounds of bees, animals and birds, and which was enhanced by a lake whose clear water resembled the minds of great souls and by a breeze carrying the fragrance of hundred-petaled lotuses. Seeing all this, Lord Krishna decided to enjoy the auspicious atmosphere.” (S. bhag. 10:15:3)

That Other Forest
→ Devamrita Swami's Facebook notes

The Forest of Material Enjoyment offers meager and miserly, stingy and mingy sexual gratification in return for our constant struggling with its immense obstacles and exasperating deficiencies. 

You see, on the material platform, living a “balanced life” is impossible, because the uncontrolled mind and senses dictate the whole temporary show.

The other option? Krishna’s supreme playground, the Vrindavana forest, infinitely attracts all five senses. There, purely spiritual sense objects nourish each spiritual sense of the spiritual body. Krishna, of course, leads the way in purely blissful forest adventures. But eternally emember the crucial distinction: He enjoys directly, whereas we, His parts, enjoy by serving and relishing His enjoyment. 

Just by our hearing of how Krishna enjoys the Vrindavana forest brings us precious relief from the blazing forest fire of material existence. What’s more, simply hearing attentively of how Krishna enjoys gradually brings us the supreme dynamic of life: spotless love for Krishna.

Eyes: the stunning beauty of Vrindavana’s forest scenery—trees, flowers, lakes, rivers—gladdens the sense of sight.

Nose: the omnipresent fragrance of lotus flowers enlivens the sense of smell.

Ears: the sounds of birds, bees, and other forest animals enchant the sense of hearing.

Tongue: delightful flavours from the sweet water of transparent lakes, transported by the forest breezes, enliven the sense of taste.

Touch: cooling droplets of water carried from those same forest lakes by those same breezes stimulate the tactile sense.

Krishna feels pleased by the atmosphere of the Vrindavana forest. The Supreme Personality of Pleasure, He personally appreciates how the forest strives to serve Him with pleasure.

Let’s go there.

“The Supreme Personality of Godhead looked over that forest, which resounded with the charming sounds of bees, animals and birds, and which was enhanced by a lake whose clear water resembled the minds of great souls and by a breeze carrying the fragrance of hundred-petaled lotuses. Seeing all this, Lord Krishna decided to enjoy the auspicious atmosphere.” (S. bhag. 10:15:3)

Designer Forests
→ Devamrita Swami's Facebook notes

Which forest do you like? Life for me is a choice of two forests. Let’s meet the options. First, the forest of material enjoyment—familiar territory to us all. As described in the Fifth Canto, Srimad-bhagavatam, this woodland beckons to us with material opportunities, acquisitions, and sense objects—all for me and mine.

Our enjoying spirit produces the bodily conception of life: “I’ve got to have it!” And then, “Got to get more.” Like merchants seeking valuable commodities or nations probing the Earth for oil and strategic ores, we trudge deeper into the forest—sense gratification, achievement, and exploitation on our mind. After all, we are the predominators, the enjoyers, right?

Pitiably, though, what we planned as a profitable outing turns into a nightmare of entanglement, for the pure spirit soul. The summary of Chapter 13 tells us:

“In this forest there are plunderers (the six senses) as well as carnivorous animals like jackals, wolves and lions (wife, children and other relatives) who are always anxious to suck the blood from the head of the family. The forest plunderers and the carnivorous blood-sucking animals combine to exploit the energy of a man within this material world. 

“In this forest there is also a black hole, covered by grass, into which one may fall. Coming into the forest and being captivated by so many material attractions, one identifies himself with this material world, society, friendship, love and family.

“Having lost the path and not knowing where to go, being harassed by animals and birds, one is also victimized by many desires. Thus one works very hard within the forest and wanders here and there. He becomes captivated by temporary happiness and becomes aggrieved by so-called distress. Actually one simply suffers in the forest from so-called happiness and distress.

“Sometimes he is attacked by a snake (deep sleep), and due to the snakebite he loses consciousness and becomes puzzled and bewildered about discharging his duties. Sometimes he is attracted by women other than his wife, and thus be thinks he enjoys extramarital love with another woman. He is attacked by various diseases, by lamentation and by summer and winter. Thus one within the forest of the material world suffers the pains of material existence.

“Expecting to become happy, the living entity changes his position from one place to another, but actually a materialistic person within the material world is never happy. Being constantly engaged in materialistic activities, he is always disturbed. He forgets that one day he has to die. Although he suffers severely, being illusioned by the material energy, he still hankers after material happiness. In this way he completely forgets his relationship with the Supreme Personality of Godhead.”

Now that was just from the chapter summary. Just think what the full chapter of verses and purports is like! And then because the audience didn’t grasp the full import of this forest allegory given in Chapter 13, the speaker further elucidates, in the next chapter. 

Tell me, how can we go wrong, with all this crucial information, patience, and thoroughness at our fingertips? Yes, maya makes us crazy. We work, struggle, and exhaust ourselves, just to live a lie. Humans are madly deforesting the Earth, but unaided by Krishna, there’s one they’ll never clear: the forest of material enjoyment.

But what about the other choice of forest? We’ll get to that next.

 

Chowpatty Festival, Mumbai © 2013 Michelle Haymoz

Chowpatty Festival, Mumbai © 2013 Michelle Haymoz

Designer Forests
→ Devamrita Swami's Facebook notes

Which forest do you like? Life for me is a choice of two forests. Let’s meet the options. First, the forest of material enjoyment—familiar territory to us all. As described in the Fifth Canto, Srimad-bhagavatam, this woodland beckons to us with material opportunities, acquisitions, and sense objects—all for me and mine.

Our enjoying spirit produces the bodily conception of life: “I’ve got to have it!” And then, “Got to get more.” Like merchants seeking valuable commodities or nations probing the Earth for oil and strategic ores, we trudge deeper into the forest—sense gratification, achievement, and exploitation on our mind. After all, we are the predominators, the enjoyers, right?

Pitiably, though, what we planned as a profitable outing turns into a nightmare of entanglement, for the pure spirit soul. The summary of Chapter 13 tells us:

“In this forest there are plunderers (the six senses) as well as carnivorous animals like jackals, wolves and lions (wife, children and other relatives) who are always anxious to suck the blood from the head of the family. The forest plunderers and the carnivorous blood-sucking animals combine to exploit the energy of a man within this material world. 

“In this forest there is also a black hole, covered by grass, into which one may fall. Coming into the forest and being captivated by so many material attractions, one identifies himself with this material world, society, friendship, love and family.

“Having lost the path and not knowing where to go, being harassed by animals and birds, one is also victimized by many desires. Thus one works very hard within the forest and wanders here and there. He becomes captivated by temporary happiness and becomes aggrieved by so-called distress. Actually one simply suffers in the forest from so-called happiness and distress.

“Sometimes he is attacked by a snake (deep sleep), and due to the snakebite he loses consciousness and becomes puzzled and bewildered about discharging his duties. Sometimes he is attracted by women other than his wife, and thus be thinks he enjoys extramarital love with another woman. He is attacked by various diseases, by lamentation and by summer and winter. Thus one within the forest of the material world suffers the pains of material existence.

“Expecting to become happy, the living entity changes his position from one place to another, but actually a materialistic person within the material world is never happy. Being constantly engaged in materialistic activities, he is always disturbed. He forgets that one day he has to die. Although he suffers severely, being illusioned by the material energy, he still hankers after material happiness. In this way he completely forgets his relationship with the Supreme Personality of Godhead.”

Now that was just from the chapter summary. Just think what the full chapter of verses and purports is like! And then because the audience didn’t grasp the full import of this forest allegory given in Chapter 13, the speaker further elucidates, in the next chapter. 

Tell me, how can we go wrong, with all this crucial information, patience, and thoroughness at our fingertips? Yes, maya makes us crazy. We work, struggle, and exhaust ourselves, just to live a lie. Humans are madly deforesting the Earth, but unaided by Krishna, there’s one they’ll never clear: the forest of material enjoyment.

But what about the other choice of forest? We’ll get to that next.

 

Chowpatty Festival, Mumbai © 2013 Michelle Haymoz

Chowpatty Festival, Mumbai © 2013 Michelle Haymoz

Hot Danger in the Summer Night
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Strangely my sleep broke, in the middle of the night. Sometimes, owing to so much traveling, I do wake up at odd hours not knowing where I am. But this sudden awakening was different. Arising clumsily in the darkness, stumbling around, half-asleep, I kept asking myself, “Why am I awake, what’s this all about?” 

I found myself staggering toward the window overlooking the backyard. Body dragging, eyelids drooping, I looked out. Great balls of fire.

An intense blaze consumed the back yard, its flames reaching from the ground below to upper levels of the house. Supersoul, the best security, had awakened me. 

Quickly, while calling the fire brigade, all the occupants prepared to exit downstairs, through the front door. The members of each social order, each ashram, scooped up what was most essential to them: the householders grabbed their baby, and the sannyasi, his travel documents.

Waiting in front of the building, the neighbours all notified, we heard the sirens of the fire trucks before we saw them—just as a bhakti-yogi first hears the spiritual reality and then sees. Approximately five minutes after our emergency call, the firemen and firewomen of Melbourne, Australia, jumped off their trucks, and with fixed focus trooped single file into the narrow passageway behind the houses. The fire, now roaring wildly, was under attack.

Anticipating a synthetic blaze, the lead fire fighters had tanks of chemical extinguisher strapped to their backs. Behind the houses was a restaurant under renovation, stockpiling paints, enamels, varnishes,  and assorted building materials in a rear yard shared with the residences. Who set the fire?

During the day, temperatures had reached 40 degrees C (104 F); night-time brought slight relief—down to 36 C. Roasted by the heat, the man-made chemicals spontaneously ignited, the fire feasting on all the building materials, melting anything it couldn’t burn.

Just as living entities burn to death in fires they didn’t cause, similarly they undergo varieties of suffering in material worlds and bodies they didn’t create. In other words, we spirit souls get the blame for associating with material nature, with a material body, even though we are not the ultimate source or the ultimate cause of material nature and its various bodies.

As Krishna says in Bhagavad-gita (13.21-22): 

“Nature is said to be the cause of all material causes and effects, whereas the living entity is the cause of the various sufferings and enjoyments in this world. 

“The living entity in material nature thus follows the ways of life, enjoying the three modes of nature. This is due to his association with that material nature. Thus he meets with good and evil among various species.” 

Forget the innocence plea. We are blameworthy because we chose to associate and identify with the temporary bodies and locales that material nature supplies. Forgetting Krishna, we attained those residences due to our mistaken desires. Then we further complicate our plight by plunging into the material flavours of happiness and distress—intricacies packaged into those accommodations according to our past karma.

At 2am, the fire in the back extinguished, the sleepy devotees reentered the house. Glancing out the window before trying to get some rest, I saw fire investigators raking through the rubble and ashes. They wanted to make sure of the cause—no arson but spontaneous combustion of the overheated chemicals. 

Bhakti-yogis know, however, that in the blazing fire of material existence, though we are not the ultimate cause, we deserve the blame. We chose to hang out here, in a high-risk, fire-hazard zone. Amidst the accumulated trash-heaps of our material desires, spontaneously igniting frequently, we try to laugh and play.

Hot Danger in the Summer Night
→ Devamrita Swami's Facebook notes

Strangely my sleep broke, in the middle of the night. Sometimes, owing to so much traveling, I do wake up at odd hours not knowing where I am. But this sudden awakening was different. Arising clumsily in the darkness, stumbling around, half-asleep, I kept asking myself, “Why am I awake, what’s this all about?” 

I found myself staggering toward the window overlooking the backyard. Body dragging, eyelids drooping, I looked out. Great balls of fire.

An intense blaze consumed the back yard, its flames reaching from the ground below to upper levels of the house. Supersoul, the best security, had awakened me. 

Quickly, while calling the fire brigade, all the occupants prepared to exit downstairs, through the front door. The members of each social order, each ashram, scooped up what was most essential to them: the householders grabbed their baby, and the sannyasi, his travel documents.

Waiting in front of the building, the neighbours all notified, we heard the sirens of the fire trucks before we saw them—just as a bhakti-yogi first hears the spiritual reality and then sees. Approximately five minutes after our emergency call, the firemen and firewomen of Melbourne, Australia, jumped off their trucks, and with fixed focus trooped single file into the narrow passageway behind the houses. The fire, now roaring wildly, was under attack.

Anticipating a synthetic blaze, the lead fire fighters had tanks of chemical extinguisher strapped to their backs. Behind the houses was a restaurant under renovation, stockpiling paints, enamels, varnishes,  and assorted building materials in a rear yard shared with the residences. Who set the fire?

During the day, temperatures had reached 40 degrees C (104 F); night-time brought slight relief—down to 36 C. Roasted by the heat, the man-made chemicals spontaneously ignited, the fire feasting on all the building materials, melting anything it couldn’t burn.

Just as living entities burn to death in fires they didn’t cause, similarly they undergo varieties of suffering in material worlds and bodies they didn’t create. In other words, we spirit souls get the blame for associating with material nature, with a material body, even though we are not the ultimate source or the ultimate cause of material nature and its various bodies.

As Krishna says in Bhagavad-gita (13.21-22): 

“Nature is said to be the cause of all material causes and effects, whereas the living entity is the cause of the various sufferings and enjoyments in this world. 

“The living entity in material nature thus follows the ways of life, enjoying the three modes of nature. This is due to his association with that material nature. Thus he meets with good and evil among various species.” 

Forget the innocence plea. We are blameworthy because we chose to associate and identify with the temporary bodies and locales that material nature supplies. Forgetting Krishna, we attained those residences due to our mistaken desires. Then we further complicate our plight by plunging into the material flavours of happiness and distress—intricacies packaged into those accommodations according to our past karma.

At 2am, the fire in the back extinguished, the sleepy devotees reentered the house. Glancing out the window before trying to get some rest, I saw fire investigators raking through the rubble and ashes. They wanted to make sure of the cause—no arson but spontaneous combustion of the overheated chemicals. 

Bhakti-yogis know, however, that in the blazing fire of material existence, though we are not the ultimate cause, we deserve the blame. We chose to hang out here, in a high-risk, fire-hazard zone. Amidst the accumulated trash-heaps of our material desires, spontaneously igniting frequently, we try to laugh and play.

Devil or Angel?
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Mirror, mirror on the wall, tell me how I’m special, among them all. Innocent, guilty, or somewhere between? Privately, introspective spiritual persons often interrogate themselves about their honest-to-goodness (or honest-to badness) genuine worth. It’s good to face the truth and swallow hard: harbouring material desire is not innocent, normal,or even acceptable—that is, when considered from the viewpoint of the real world, Krishna’s perspective.

Ouch! Who wants to be known as damaged goods—deformed, misshapen, even perverted.

Gradually, as we spiritually advance in bhakti, we shed the illusory cloak that confers an imagined respectability upon our foolish temporary desires and pursuits for temporary gain. We realize that somehow we have to squeeze into one of two cubby-holes: straightaway embracing the full standard for sane life or determinedly developing toward that normal standard of spiritual sanity.

Though overnight enlightenment hasn’t happened to us, yet we certainly can be progressive and proactive about our spiritual growth. What hurts us most is when we seek to justify or rationalize the material desires that we allow to corrupt us—you know, the maya nonsense that has deviated us from our original constitutional position.

The guiding principle of bhakti in this Age of Quarrel is both magnanimously liberal and therapeutically prescriptive: “The Krishna consciousness movement is meant to attract all types of men, even those who desire things other than the Lord’s devotional service. Through the association of devotees, they gradually begin to render devotional service.” (Cc. Madhya 24:124 purport)

Hung Up
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Sometimes what I read ties me in knots. Suddenly the purports in Srila Prabhupada’s books reveal their unlimited depths, and I feel like a small child gazing upon the ocean for the first time: “When does it end; where is the bottom?” Let me plunge you into a section of Chaitanya-caritamrita that has overloaded my circuits for two weeks—therefore I didn’t write anything (an excellent excuse).

In Jagannatha Puri the devotees of Mahaprabhu had gone to the sea to bathe, preparing for their awesome lunch. Meanwhile, Lord Caitanya sought out Haridasa Thakura—finding him, of course, chanting the mahamantra in ecstatic love of Krishna. Immediately Haridasa Thakura falls on the ground like a stick, offering his respects. Mahaprabhu picks him up and embraces him. 

Now, here is what has shut me down: “Then both the Lord and His servant began to cry in ecstatic love. Indeed, the Lord was transformed by the qualities of His servant, and the servant was  transformed by the qualities of his master.” (Madhya 11:187)

Although Mahaprabhu, Krishna Himself, is always the predominator, and the living entity, the predominated, nevertheless, in the exchange of ecstatic love, both become transformed.

This is Krishna’s intelligent design—the innermost mystery of existence. 

As Prabhupada writes in the purport:  “. . . the servant of the Lord is the heart of the Lord, and the Lord is the heart of the servant. . . .The Lord is always eager to congratulate the servant because of the servant’s transcendental qualities. The servant pleasingly renders service unto the Lord, and the lord also very pleasingly reciprocates, rendering even more service unto the servant.” 

 Meanwhile, we are afraid to intensify our relationship with Krishna? Such paranoid madness can only be the result of contact with maya. 

“I’ll Be Your Best Friend”
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The interior of Mexico, Guadalajara, is one of my last stops, before a 4-month journey around the world ends. Of course, the life of a traveling swami means that the finish of one journey soon fades into the fresh start of another. Will ever there be “home sweet home” for me? Well, frankly not in this lifetime, not in this world.

Don’t worry, the reality is not as cold and heartless as it may sound. As the years in bhakti roll by, the more I seek to surround myself with glorification of Krishna, the more at home I feel. Basking in the association of bhakti-yogis eager to share talks and songs of Krishna, for me, means lying on the genuine lap of luxury. Just to be in the midst of Krishna talks and Krishna kirtan “sends me.”

Maybe when you were a little, you would tell another kid, “Do this for me—for example, give me one of your candies—and I promise, you’ll be my best friend.” So if you want to grant me mercy, then indulge me in hearing, reading, and singing of Govinda, the enlivener of the cows and sense. Do it, and you can be my friend.

And remember, actually every living entity is homeless in this world, having strayed from our original home with Krishna, the Supreme Personality of Pleasure, who says:

“I am not in Vaikuntha nor in the hearts of the yogis. I remain where devotees engage in glorifying My activities.” 

Sharing with You: A Blur in the Life
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Two weeks of winter in the Northeast USA and Canada, and my mind tells my body I’ve had more than my fill. But bhakti-yogis are in the business of controlling the pushy mind with the gravity of spiritual intelligence. 

Nevertheless, even swamis have their human side, to say the least. Therefore, I’ll give you a glimpse, just to share with you. Let me explain that besides this bodily machine having long acclimated to comparatively nonexistent winters down under, in Australia and New Zealand, also—truth be told—immediately preceding the past two icy weeks, the body was one month heating in India, as the soul luxuriated in eternal spiritual sustenance. 

Since leaving Vrindavan November 14, devotional life, for the most part, has been fast forward 4X.

November 14: Departed Govardhana Hill the evening of Govardhana Puja, to catch a flight the next early morning from Delhi to London.

Nov. 15: Late evening arrival in London.

Nov. 16: Evening program at the London School of Business followed by a night program at the Mantra Lounge, a kirtan undertaking by the London Soho temple, arranged by the industrious Jai Murari dasi.

Nov. 17: Prabhupada’s Disappearance Day. Midday flight to the USA, to the Gita-Nagari farm.

Nov. 18: Govardhana-puja celebration in the presence of Sri Sri Radha-Damodara.

Nov. 18 to 21: Meet with the farm staff and supporters, while adjusting to time-zone changes (9.5 hours different than India and 5 than the UK.)

Nov. 21: Morning flight to Toronto, where Mangal-Arti dasi was ready to roll, maximally, literally, as soon as I walked off the delayed flight. Evening program at Ryerson University.

Nov. 22: Met with Candramauli Swami for lunch. Evening program at Ontario College of Art and Design

Nov. 23:  Met with Bhakti Marga Swami for lunch. Evening program at Bhakti Lounge.

Nov. 24 to 25: Weekend retreat hosted by the Bhakti Lounge at a venue two hours outside of Toronto, followed by a quick visit on Sunday night to the Toronto temple for singing the Damodarastaka.

Nov. 26: Program at George Brown College.

Nov. 27: Trying to arrive in New York for the weekly Tuesday night program at the Bhakti Center. 

No go flying out of Toronto, due to snowy airports in New York. One flight cancelled, next flight cancelled, third flight delayed. The long wait at the airport did give me time to catch my breath. In the so-called Information Age that means catch up on email—piled up while in India.

Since the devastating Hurricane Sandy, the Bhakti Center in New York had electricity again, the subways below it rumbled again, drained of floodwaters. Hardened New Yorkers resumed their habitual frenzied pace, in “the city that never sleeps.”

After several days of programs in the city of my birth, it’s now time to see the sun again. I’m not flying almost six hours to Sin City, Las Vegas, though, to indulge my senses.  My core desire is to please Krishna’s senses by satisfying His devotee, my eternal spiritual father.  Otherwise all this traveling has no meaning and certainly no attraction.