Jahnava Devi Dasi: Of all Srila Prabhupada’s qualities, the one that overwhelmed me was his inconceivable humility.
His humility disarmed my illusion to the point that I could sincerely ask him a question.
At first, when I raised my hand he ignored me. He waited until somebody else in the room raised their hand, and he answered their question.
This happened three or four times and in my mind I was rephrasing my question. Then I asked my question. I closed my eyes and said, “Sri Bhaktivedanta Swami?”
I said his name and for a moment I became disoriented. I couldn’t even go on with the question.
Srila Prabhupada very patiently waited for me. It was an intense moment because his glance and his mercy were upon me.
I said, “How is it that the Absolute, which is at this point, for me, beyond human comprehension, how can it take this form of Krishna-Radha?”
Prabhupada said, “It is His mercy.” Then he said something astounding, a mystical thing that broke through my hippie misconceptions.
Srila Prabhupada said, “The Bhagavatam says that if you want to understand God, His name, His quality, His paraphernalia, His form, it is not possible by your present senses. Your senses are so contaminated that it is not possible for you to understand God by speculation. Then?”
“How it is possible? God reveals Himself to you by your service attitude. And that service attitude begins from your tongue. How? You chant Hare Krishna and taste Krishna prasadam. Two things.”
"You cannot understand what is God, but God will reveal to you, ‘Here I am.’ Just as you cannot ask the sun, 'Please rise up I want to see you.’ Oh, the sun is not your servant. But when the sun reveals himself to you, you see yourself, you see the sun, and you see the whole world nicely. You have to wait for that revelation.”
Six months before this, after I’d fasted for days, I had climbed a mountain all night long and was sitting on the edge of a cliff meditating on om.
My plan was that when the sun rose, I would merge with it and become one with the One. But the day was cloudy and when the sun rose I couldn’t see it.
The night before I had come to Krishna consciousness, I had prayed to a deity of Lord Shiva to please help me know the answer for everything, and then the next day I met Srila Prabhupada. How everything happened was wonderful.
After Srila Prabhupada’s lecture, he went back to his apartment and we all got ready for bed.
Thirty minutes later word got out that Srila Prabhupada had come back. We scrambled together, came into the temple room and sat there expectantly.
Srila Prabhupada was grave. At first he didn’t say anything. He played a tape of Vande 'ham with himself on the harmonium and said, “I have just received a telegram from India saying that His Holiness Keshava Maharaj, my sannyas guru, is no more. He has entered Krishna’s abode.”
Srila Prabhupada said that Keshava Maharaj (in te photo) was a Vaishnava, an ocean of mercy, and he said, “I am offering my respectful obeisances to him along with my disciples.”
As he talked, he remembered Keshava Maharaj, and a tear slowly came and hovered a little while.
That tear was like the shining diamond of his separation from his sannyas guru, it was such a beautiful tear. And at last it fell.
Srila Prabhupada had written a resolution of bereavement and asked everyone to sign it. One girl, Madhavi-lata, took it around.
She wasn’t going to let another guest and me sign but Srila Prabhupada said, “No, no, everyone here, they are all witnesses.”
Then I knew that Srila Prabhupada was accepting me as a part of something that was happening. It was a wonderful experience.
Excerpt from “Memories-Anecdotes of a Modern-Day Saint”
by Siddhanta das
www.prabhupadamemories.com
By Kesava Krsna Dasa
By Praghosa Dasa
By Arcana siddhi
By Amy McCarthy
By Nimai das
